You've read about all the sleepers, waiver wire pickups and starter suggestions based on matchups. Now let me burst some bubbles and tell you who I think is going to bust big time in Week 5.

This isn't to troll or spread hate - that's what those political sites are for. Think of this as a public service for fanboys and truth deniers who insist that everything is going to be alright, when it's clearly not. If you don't believe me, just ask the general public on Twitter. They know everything.
Warning: while the picks made in this article are completely serious, you may find sarcastic humor laced throughout. If you don't have any sense of humor whatsoever, turn back now before you get all worked up.

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• Dynasty fantasy football rankings

Week 4 Recap

Too bold? Let's keep it simple this time around. I got a little cocky after a 70% success rate the previous two weeks and decided to list a bunch of fantasy studs in my Week 4 article. As a result, I basically stunk it up last week, especially with quarterbacks, so I'm not even going to go there this time around. Matt Ryan obviously took it as a personal affront when he read his name in this series and proceeded to go bananas in a career-high game. Derek Carr threw four TDs, Le'veon Bell ran for 144, Jimmy Graham pulled in 113 yards... even the players who were held mostly in check somehow found the end zone. So, it would seem the biggest bust of Week 4 was me. Fortunately, people have short attention spans these days, so my outstanding performance in this week's column will erase any memory that Week 4 ever existed. There's one thing Odell Beckham and I have in common - eternal optimism.

Top 10 Busts for Week 5

Giovani Bernard (RB, CIN) - Jerry's Boys have not allowed a receiving TD to a running back yet this year and have limited them to 16 catches for 157 yards over four games. That doesn't play into Bernard's favor. The Bengals don't figure to be in catch-up mode either, as Dallas is again without top target Dez Bryant and will try to slow things down with the running game. Bernard is always a boom-bust type of player, even in PPR. This week figures to be on the bust side. Then again, somebody's got to catch the ball in Dallas. Jerry Jones certainly isn't going to do it.

 
 
Matt Jones (RB, WAS) - The top man running in Washington these days concluded his most successful campaign of the Fall season last week. Jones ran for 117 yards and a TD in a win against Cleveland. Now, let's remind ourselves that these numbers came against Cleveland. By contrast, the Ravens boast the fourth-toughest run defense in the league for fantasy purposes. Jones has little competition around him for touches, but that might not stop the Redskins' run game from stopping itself. Hey, at least they pulled out a victory last week. Crisis averted.

 
 
Isaiah Crowell (RB, CLE) - Speaking of the Browns, Isaiah Crowell has been one the most pleasant surprises among all running backs this early NFL season, rushing for 394 yards, three TD and a league-high 6.5 Y/A. Bill Belichick doesn't like that. Not that he has anything against Crowell personally, but he isn't going to let you waltz into his house (or your own) and run crazy. Brady's back and he's probably mad too. This game could get downright ugly, which doesn't bode well for the Cleveland running game and Crowell especially, since he doesn't catch the ball out of the backfield. I wonder if the Browns could trade Crowell for Belichick straight up to get him back.

 
 
Terrance West (RB, BAL) - Great job Terrance! And now you're done... 113 yards and a TD in his first crack at the feature role in Baltimore might also be his last. Kenneth Dixon is set to return from injury, which is the real reason Justin Forsett suddenly became expendable again. Many think West will still pad his stats one more time against a weak Redskins defense in Week 5, but that's not really his thing. Before last week, West had exactly one 100-yd game under his belt, which came in the very first game of his pro career in 2014. While being a Raven is certainly better than being a Brown, I think many are overestimating the advantage that potentially brings.

 
 
Michael Crabtree (WR, OAK) - No, he won't go for three touchdowns again. That doesn't mean you should automatically bench him, but he may have his hands full this week. Top corner Jason Verrett is out for the season, but Crabtree could see a big dose of Casey Hayward this week, which isn't a good thing. Hayward has been a pleasant surprise, ranking as one of the top cover corners in the league so far. Defenses are learning that Crabtree may be the bigger threat than Amari Cooper at this point and will adjust accordingly. There is no better sell-high candidate than Crabtree entering Week 5. Remember that he has never scored 10 TD in a season and only surpassed the 1,000 yard mark once, back in 2012. Sorry, Raiders fans. Enjoy the moment!

 
 
DeAndre Hopkins (WR, HOU) - The Vikings have effectively shut down Odell Beckham, Kelvin Benjamin and Andre Johnson this season. OK, maybe Johnson isn't quite what he used to be, but you get the point. Matchup aside, Hopkins has seen his stock drop somewhat now that he is starting to play second fiddle to rookie Will Fuller. Over the first four games, Hopkins has 33 targets, whereas Fuller has 34. Don't be that guy who panics and sells low on Hopkins, but don't expect a breakout game this week either. That should come next week against Indy. Unless somebody has a sudden revelation this week.

 
 
Alshon Jeffery (WR, CHI) - Kevin White's absence may not work in Jeffery's favor. Aside from facing Vontae Davis most of the day, he will also get plenty of attention from safeties, linebackers, coaches, cheerleaders and everybody else in the stadium who knows that Jeffery is the only receiver worth covering. If Zach Miller isn't able to play, the Colts should just put 10 guys on Jeffery, one to shadow Jordan Howard and dare them to run. Eddie Royal? Oh yes, he's back from the waiver wire to save us again! I shouldn't kid - some people tend to get a bit carried away with all this fantasy football business. Even when it comes to Eddie Royal.

 
 
Brandon Marshall (WR, NYJ) - Eric Decker is out, Matt Forte is questionable and Ryan Fitzpatrick has gone color blind. The Jets offense isn't exactly trending upward these days. Marshall has been the one constant, even while fighting through injuries himself. Last week he put up 89 yards and a touchdown against a tough Seattle defense. This week would figure to be slightly easier, but it won't. Whether it's Rock Cockrell and/or William Gay covering Marshall, expect the veteran receiver to get special attention. Add to that the fact that Marshall has never scored a TD in five career games against the Steelers while averaging barely 60 yards per game, it's likely Marshall will disappoint. I know, I said that last week but we're forgetting that ever happened, right? Before you accuse me of being a Jets hater (actually I am), keep in mind that I'm also a Dolfan, so I can sympathize with starting 1-3. It ain't easy...

 
 
Tajae Sharpe (WR, TEN) - Sharpe has been one of the buzziest rookies of the early season, snatching the top wideout spot in Tennessee right under the nose of... well, nobody really. Sharpe has been thought to be a solid PPR value and seems to have a good matchup against the Dolphins weak secondary. When Tony Lippett is looked at as an upgrade over what's currently on the field, things aren't going well. It should be noted that Sharpe's reception totals have dropped each week (7, 4, 3, 2), along with his Catch%, which was a lowly 28.6% in Week 4. This matchup looks tasty on paper, as the Dolphins' cornerbacks are barely NFL-caliber, but Sharpe did very little in back-to-back tilts with Detroit and Oakland and has yet to score a touchdown. You could say his fantasy value is due for a sharp decline. Yes, I've been waiting all season to pull that one out.

 
 
Jordan Reed (TE, WAS) - Doubling down against the Redskins, I apparently have more faith in the Baltimore defense than I ever imagined. The Ravens allow the sixth fewest points against tight ends this season. Reed is one of the top TE around and finally busted out with nine catches, 73 yards and two touchdowns last week. Something's got to give. I'll say that it will be Reed and the 'Skins offense. That gives me another reason to root against Washington, including this guy. You've been warned.