Daily Sports Recap for 12/8: Uneventful Edition

Welcome to the Daily Sports Recap, where we try to figure out if anything really funny happened on Monday, besides my fantasy playoff lead evaporating because of Matt Ryan and Julio Jones.  Which really isn't that funny at all.

Sports News From Yesterday (12/8)

Rams Send Out All Six Players Drafted After RG3 Trade as Team Captains in Washington

MAXIMUM DISRESPECT.  When asked about the decision that was so obviously meant just to screw with Washington's front office, coaching staff, players and fanbase in general, Rams coach Jeff Fisher said "I think they've got more things to worry about than the coin toss yesterday."  Fisher then cut off the interview in order to go back to searching for all the fucks he had to give, but alas, he was fresh out of them, perhaps due to his team shutting out its second consecutive opponent.

In response to the blatant act of just not caring one bit, the NFL's office of discipline ruled that Fisher was to be executed at midfield in the Rams' Thursday night game against Arizona.  The Rams' front office appealed the penalty, but their representatives left the meeting unconvinced that Fisher's case was fairly heard.  When asked for comment, the Rams' lawyers said "Goodell was just sitting in the meeting sharpening some huge sword muttering about how 'the commissioner who passes the sentence should swing the sword.'"  Our hearts go out to the entire Rams family in this trying time.

Heisman Award Finalists Announced

Curiously, though, the list just said "Marcus Mariota, Guy Who Isn't Marcus Mariota #1, and Guy Who Isn't Marcus Mariota #2."

In all seriousness, Melvin Gordon and Amari Cooper chose a terrible season to have fantastic seasons in.  In any other year, they'd be much closer contenders, but Mariota just had his worst game of the season against Arizona in the Pac-12 championship, a game his team won 51-13.  This was also a game in which Mariota went 25 of 38 for 313 yards and two TDs through the air.  And added three rushing touchdowns on top of that.  And had zero turnovers.  And a passer rating of 152.3.  Again, this was his worst game of the season.  Someone needs to find the magic copy of NCAA Football 2014 whose cheat codes can affect reality and take it away from Oregon.

Falcons Lose to Packers, Ensure NFC South Division Champion Can't Have Winning Record

With their Monday night loss, the first-place Falcons fell to 5-8, though the 5-8 Saints and 4-8-1 Panthers are still playoff threats.  And people were pissed off about the college system.

As far as the Daily Recap goes, this one's gonna be short since the next most exciting thing to happen in sports yesterday was the Royal Couple showing up in the third quarter of the Cavs-Nets game and making Kevin Love miss a free throw. When you've hit "British People Watch Basketball," it's been a slow day.  See you next time!